7.01.2009

Up. Down.

I love roller coasters.

Like the huge, twisty, make you want to throw up your slurpee, roller coasters.

In fact, if I could live at an amusement park...I just might do it. I wouldn't necessarily want to keep up with my kids around an amusement park all day every day...but me? By myself? You betcha.

What I don't like is the roller coaster that my emotions go on somedays.

Like today.

I went from laughing till I cried to crying till I laughed. And then crying till I cried some more.

I giggled with my girlfriends, and then cried because I felt like I disappointed one.

I played games with my boys and chuckled at their silly sayings, and then cried because I feel like I could be a better mother.

I smiled at the thought of my life and how blessed I am, and then sat in my chair and sobbed because I feel like I've let myself down.

These roller coasters are tough.

But, I guess I'm grateful for the high parts. The loops that send me soaring in the breezes before flinging me down into the pits....because at least then I know, at some point, I'll head back up.

Good day? Yes.
Rough day? Yes.

Better day tomorrow? Guaranteed.

16 comments:

Jim said...

Amb,
I suppose I could launch into a whole scenario of up and down stuff, but you already know most of that. In fact, you've as much as related it already in your blogging self-talk. I do like what I've heard some say that gets at explaining the process. One is that if the mountain were smooth, you couldn't climb it. Another is you don't have mountains with out valleys, and the mountains would not be near as majestic and beautiful were they not seen from the valleys. The lows are good because they elavate the hope of the highs to come. It is true that some roller coasters can make you sick. Now, that's something to study on - WHY? I'll have to dwell on that one!

For my part, I'm sure glad I've daughters that can communicate their ups and downs with understanding of where they are at any point, and the answers to their delimmas already in mind.
Their sharing is a real source of encouragement to others who have "RIDDEN" the coaster, too. I'm proud of them.

I heart you, too!
Jim-Dad

Beam Me Up Scotty said...

Had the same kind of day. Something with the moon???
Many nights I have thanked God for making a day only 24 hours long.
Here's to better days ahead!!

Kelly

Jessica said...

Sorry you had a rough one, but at least you had a good one in the midst of the roughness! Perk up buttercup!

Mich said...

I love you!

Call me if you need to talk.

Jennifer said...

Sorry you had a rough day!! Maybe it's all the excercise!! LOL!!

I think we all have days like this every once in awhile!! Just remember how much you are appreciated as a wife, mother, and especially friend!!

Hope tomorrow is better!! Trust me!! Me doing Zumba will keep you laughing all day tomorrow!!

Love ya girly!!

Jackie @ Our Moments Our Memories said...

Honey, you are so not alone. Today was a definite down day for me. And those times when you cry til you laugh and laugh til you cry - I SO get that.

Tomorrow WILL be better. Love you, girl.

Cathy said...

I heart your authenticity.

May I suggest a trip to Oregon, a PDDP w/ a friend, and a little dance off to chase the blues away???

...or maybe I'll just pray for you and that you'll see His mercies that are new every morning...yup, that's what I'll do.

whimzie said...

Some days are like that. Even in Australia.

Sorry. On some days I quote Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.

I know the roller coaster of which you speak. It's exhausting! I hope today's ride has way more "ups" than "downs."

Carpoolqueen said...

Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion.

Signed,
Truvy

buscher3 said...

Zumba will do you some good then, huh??

We all hop on that roller coaster every now and then, unfortunately. I just rode it earlier this week, in fact. Part of being a woman, I guess. Hang in there!!!

mimi said...

When I first read this...I thought "I don't like roller coasters". I'm the girl waiting by the operator holding everyones wallets and purses(y'know till the ride is over). BUT....I have not been able to avoid the daily life roller coaster that you meant. OY! I'm with you...weeping then laughing. You are not alone in that(I'm sitting beside you on that roller coaster!).

I hope that today is all smiles!!

mer@lifeat7000feet said...

Such a great post, Amber. I am up and down all the time...hang in there!

Stephanie @ My Answered Prayer said...

I'm sorry you had a bad day! I had no idea...hope you are having a better one b/c you know I'm not.

I'm emailing you now.

Amy Fulmer said...

Isn't that something? We beat ourselves up wanting to be the best moms we can. I think that in itself qualifies us.

fengfk2008 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Gretchen said...

Sending lurve. We know we're blessed, but we still have bad days. And bad hair days--which are probably worse. NOt that you're having one right now...but if you were, I'd still lurve you.