2.05.2009

You're Invited....To A Pity Party

Can I tell you how tired I am?

Sawyer started throwing up last night right as I was getting the boys ready for bed. I knew something was up when he didn't want to eat anything for dinner...and it was mac-n-cheese (our favorite food!). He's been going strong every 15 or 20 minutes since about 10:30 last night. Still going this morning. Poor guy. He is by far the best one of my kids when it comes to being sick. No crying. No whining. Just puppydog eyes staring at me. So pitiful. Bless his heart. I hope he is all better soon.

Because I'm so exhausted from zero sleep, my mind is a little crazy this morning. I have also found time to throw myself a little pity party throughout the night and morning. And I thought I would invite you. Feeling lucky, aren't ya?

I had to call into work sick again. Again. I hate missing work so much. I hate it. I hate leaving people in a lurch, and I hate knowing that I'm the cause of someone else's inconvenience or stress. But, I have no idea what to do about it.

Because I'm it. I'm the only one here to stay home with the kids if they get sick. Kirk's job requires him to travel so much, and when he is in town he is tied up with meetings and phone conferences all the time. His position doesn't allow him to take off at the drop of the hat. He just can't. I came to that realization a long time ago. It isn't like it is easy to take off from my job either, but I'm a mom. I think it boils down to just that.

We also have ZERO family here to help us. None. Not even a great aunt hiding in a little house somewhere who could take a turn watching a sick baby in a pinch. Nothing. All of our parents are hours and hours away from us....way too far to drive a sick little person to and then still make it to work by 8. Not going to happen. I get so tired of people complaining about their family members that live in the same town as them. They have no idea how good they have it. I have nobody. Nobody. Let me repeat. Nobody. I would gladly put up with a nosey mother-in-law to have some help. Any day.

We have great friends. We really do. But I would NEVER ask my friends to take on another kid for the day, especially one who is throwing up or running fever. No way. Even if they told me I could....I wouldn't.

So....here I sit. Waiting on Sawyer to throw up again. Bless his heart. I know he is exhausted.
And while I'm waiting....I'm pouting. And worrying. And feeling lousy for once again feeling like I'm letting everyone else down.

I know that my kids and my family are my first priority. I do. But, it doesn't make it easier to know the headache I'm giving everyone else when I'm gone.

Now I feel bad for inviting you to my pity party. So sorry. But sometimes it is just easier to vent and talk it through.

13 comments:

Marc and Charity said...

I'm so sorry! I often have that same pity party- no family around to help...it all falls on the mom....etc etc.

I hope that your boy is better soon and that you can find something positive about your day. Hey, at least you are not 39 million weeks pregnant. :) Ha. Just kidding.

Jennifer said...

Oh no! I hope he feels better soon and no one else gets it!

Kristin said...

I'm so sorry. I wish I lived closer! I would gladly help you out. I have said time and time again that even though my parents drive me insane at times thank God I have them closeby because we have friends who have nobody either and it is rough!

Hang in there, Mommy!

Does he tolerate Emetrol at all for the throwing up?

Alison said...

Man...you guys just can't keep well. Guess that just comes with the territory of having three kids all in elementary school. Hope no one else gets it!! Hang in there!!

I think the pediatricians will call in a prescription for phenagrin (spelling??) without even seeing you..especially for a stomach bug. That stuff is a miracle drug...knocks you out so you can sleep and quiets your stomach.

Stephanie @ My Answered Prayer said...

I'm so sorry!!!!!!!!!!! If you want to have some phinegrin called in...I'll go get it and bring it to you...You would do it for me so let me do it for you...Just call my cell.

And don't you worry about your pity party...throw one anytime.

Call me if you need me!

BLESSED MOMMY OF ONE said...

I am so sorry that you are going through this!! It makes for misery when your child is sick. You deserve to have a pity party. Hope everything gets better. You are in my prayers!!

Becky said...

I completely understand! We have no family here in Benton and I have had that pity party several times. I can remember sitting w/my sick baby at the Pharmacy waiting 30-45 min for a prescription since J was out of town and no one to call. (And yes I did call it in but it took that long to just get it during the winter sick months)

Just remember that even if you had family living close as sick as Sawyer is you would still be at home w/him.

Mich said...

Hug my Swayer for me...I'm sorry he is sick.

Vent away, sis! I totally understand. I have only had family close by for a year now and my kids are almost past needing anybody!

when does Kirk come home...you know it is totally his fault...when the daddys travel something ALWAYS happens!

Love ya!

Nina Diane said...

it's all good....everyone needs a pity party once in awhile! Hope Sawyer is better soon

lisa@littlesliceoflife said...

Hey, thanks for the invite!

I hope poor Sawyer is better really soon.

I have to confess that I used to like for my kids to be sick so I had a valid excuse for a guilt-free day at home. I just read what I typed and it sounds really awful. I didn't actually enjoy my kids illness...just the excuse. They could sneeze and I'd be like "Oh, maybe we ought to stay home tomorrow!"

I'm kidding.

Not really.

mer@lifeat7000feet said...

I'm all about parties...and believe me, I've thrown my share of pity-me ones.

I hope Sawyer is feeling better.

And I hear ya about being family-less. We are too. Sometimes it's nice, but mostly just sad. Hang in there, friend.

Kristin said...

Hey...if you feel up to playing the letter game...why don't you take S? :o)

Jim said...

Amb,
Sorry we can't be there for you! At least it's not as far as it was last year, though still too far for these situations, I know. You realize, of course, how much these times of attention during such need build a special and lasting appreciation for the one who sacrifices in the clinches. There may some who don't understand your absences, but many do and appreciate an individual who has that kind of care into which they entrust their kids on a daily basis. You are that kind of special person - I guess you might say it's this kind of circumstance which keeps you growing into an even more special care-giver and teacher. I know it's hard, but "no pain, no gain." The great thing about our Lord is that He doesn't get frustrated over a pity party every once in a while. He understands. Just think of how much He sits up with us during our down times!

Cheer up! This, too, will pass and Sawyer, and you, will be back in the swing of things before you know it!
I love you!
Dad