Tell It All Tuesday



Feels like it should be Friday. Already. Because I have met myself coming and going. And I've decided that I don't like me from the backside. Ick.

Reminds me that I really should go on a diet. Or exercise. Or something besides eating 4 Fruit-Roll-Ups and a Hershey bar for dinner. Oh. Yes. I. Did. And don't pretend like you're shocked. C'mon, now.

All this food/diet talk is a great lead-in to the first thing on my random listy list of goodness.

1. My friends have entered into the danger zone. They have taken the plunge into this crazy world of boot camp style exercise. There is talk of trainers, of meals with no cheese, and giving up white bread. And, quite possibly the worst of all, talk of giving up carbonated sodas. Heaven help us. This is not good news for me. Because these are my besties. These are the peeps that I scarf pizza with and slurp ice cream cones with. How can this be?! My world just got a little darker. *frown*sigh*and a big fat pout*

2. Oh my gosh. I just heard you. You totally just muttered under your breath, "Well, just join 'em. There's nothing wrong with getting healthy." Whoa, buddy. Don't start with me, you Judas. I am perfectly happy with my Diet sodas and fruit-roll-ups. So don't mess with me. And don't say such hurtful, hateful things. It's bad enough that my peeps have crossed over into the netherworld....you don't have to make me cry. It's just not nice.

3. Oh my goodness. You are still talkin' trash. What? You want to know about the hard core workout program that I was conned into doing with the husband in exchange for a trip to Mexico? Yah...well. I'm claiming Swine Flu. Because now we've been instructed by the government to not go to Mexico. And I always do what my government tells me. (I almost got through that last sentence without laughing.)

4. All this talk of food and diets and non-existence exercise plans has made me hungry for another fruit-roll-up.

5. Moving on. Before I go get the 5th one.

6. In yard sale news, I'm nowhere close to being done. I'm supposed to go set up for it tomorrow night at Steph's, and I'm freakin' out....just a little bit. Okay, a lot bit. There is no doubt that I can get it all done. The only problem is that I like to sleep. And it doesn't look like I'm getting any tonight. I'm grouchy already.

7. Yesterday was Tate's PreK field trip. I was able to go with him, which I was so excited about. I love spending the day with just 1 of my boys....it is just fun to get them off by themselves. We headed to the Little Rock Zoo. Nevermind that I have been to that zoo more times than I can count on all my fingers and toes. The chimps, grizzlies, and I are exchanging Christmas cards this year...because we are like family now. But, I had a blast. Because Tate had a blast. (Except for the weird parent that I had to spend the day with only because Tate and his kid are BFFs. Urgh. What we do for our kids.)

8. I wore a dress to school today. Only because there was not one pair of pants or capris clean in my closet. Yes, I am that far behind on my laundry. Did y'all think I was exaggerating about the piles of laundry. Oh no. It really is that bad. I know my mom is cringing at this very second. Bless her laundry-is-always-done heart. I'm sure that my sister and I haunt her dreams at night what with our kickin' housekeepin' skilz and all. She really did raise us better than that.

9. I'm watching Idol. And Adam just sang. And he is still on my nerves. Sorry Adam-hearters. We're just going to have to agree to disagree. Even though I'm right. Because Kris and Danny....oh my.

10. One last thing. I put this very perky picture of me up yesterday. Remember....me with the masking tape? Yah. Well, what you probably also noticed was that Montana-sized zit right under my Montana-sized smile line. I've been so tempted to dot it with mascara and pretend it was a beauty mark. How about it?

What? You don't think I can pull it off? Ha! What do you know? You are the same one that is talking smack about me needing to exercise.

Alright...I'm outie. Back to my masking tape and Sharpie. But I think I'm going to grab a snack first. Maybe a pop tart. Or a bowl of ice cream. Or another fruit-roll-up. And I'll eat them while thinking about my peeps chugging protein shakes and cottage cheese.


Carpoolqueen said...

I was not going to ask you about P90X, because that's just the kind of friend I am.

I do not snort or snicker about laundry, either. For those are fighting words.

Stephanie said...

I am so with you on the dieting thing. I just bought 3 "No, I'm not pregnant just fat" shirts. On a happy note...I stopped by Sonic today and bought a Dt.Dr.Pepper and pineapple drink...pretty yummy.

Stephanie @ My Answered Prayer said...

Well you know that Lisa and I can't completely go over the dark side...we're just being as supportive of our husbands as we can be. I don't have any more cokes in the cabinet...sigh...I may have headaches all week!!!!!!!!!!!

I had special K for supper and a sugar free yogurt. It wasn't too bad.

What you don't have time to price bring over and I'll price. Bring your laundry too and we can work on it during the sale...I'll even let you help me clean house :)

Mandy said...

Man! Aren't we too old for zits?! I have one on my cheek right now! There should be some benefit of getting older!

Tiffani said...

I knew before I clicked on the link that it was going to be P90X...I too did not proceed ahead, nor did I pass go, nor did I collect $200.

I will support you 100% in your "no jump on the bandwagon with dieting friends" I'm sooo over that whole idea...seriously. I'm at peace with myself and the fruit roll ups.

Hang in there w/ your yard sale stuff...you'll be so "cleansed" when it's done!!!

Mich said...

We must have the sister thing going on again, for I have a zit in the exact same place.

Love ya!

Becca~TimeWellSpent said...

You are so funny, I laughed through this whole post!

The pics of your kiddos are precious!

Jim said...

Yet another affirmation of our relative-ity! This time in double dose - tonight mom and I were competing to see who had the largest clump of Jiffy PB on a spoon, as we watched TV! Remember the attack of the PROCRASTINATOR beastie? Well, I discovered another lurking monster in our house. It's name is REFRIGERATOR!
Can you imagine that mild-mannered cooler of health, at the mere push of a TV remote button...becomes REFRIG-A-GATOR, spewing all manner of unhealthy morsels. How shall we escape? Oh, help!

Now, how's that for dramatics, Ke?
Heart you, Amb!

Jim said...

On another note, I really do heart that kid you're with in the pics! I just know there's a little HULK in there somewhere, but a real cute one that wouldn't hurt a fly! I bet you had a great time.

Michele said...

Oh Amber, please still be my friend and not think I'm a trader on ya or anything . . but step over to the other side with the besties. Girl. . . exercising and eating right makes you feel glorious! I promise. . . it makes you feel better than any fruit rollup, pop tart, cream puff . . .whatever. . I will be your cheerleader through this. I promise. If you need me to, I'll give you a pep talk every morning. Start exercising consistently and I promise your body will start to crave exercising just like it is craving that poison . . . sugar. . . the enemy.

Okay, so I'm only half playing . . . but seriously, it does make you feel better. I'm a little obsessive about exercising. I used to be much more obsessive about eating right, but have lightened up in my older age.

Good luck with your yard sale. I'd so come if I lived a few states/cities closer:) I actually am in need of lots of furniture right now. I may hit a few yard sales myself this weekend. I hope you make LOTS of money!

Gotta go lift weights and eat egg whites and drink carrot juice for breakfast. . . please don't hate me!

Gretchen said...

Well, I'm into what they call camouflage dressing, if that tells you anything about my state of affairs.

Everything in moderation. Even denial.

Blessings on your garage sale.

Lurve the beauty mark. Actually, very impressed with the technological accumen you possess. Never knew i would use the word accumen. I hope I spelled it correctly.

Time for some coffee.

Glo said...

I didn't mutter join them....I muttered that I will join YOU!LOL I know I haven't met you yet, but I can only imagine how much fun we could have if we ever did! I love junk food!LOL I hate exercise even though I need to. I tried Curves for a year and got nothing out of it.

I never even noticed your zit....even when you ponted it out. Good luck on your yard sale. I am sure it will be a success!

Well, I guess I am going to eat a snack of some kind that's not healthy.LOL Toodles!!!

Jessica said...

Ugh. I know your pain. Everyone (girls AND guys) in our Sunday School class is doing this Metabolic Research Center program. I'm pretty sure Luke and I are the only ones NOT doing it. They get super skinny, sure, but I'm pretty positive once you go off you blow right back up. We've decided we'd rather be pleasantly plump than sickeningly skinny followed by freaking huge.

Lori Motl said...

Girl, anytime you need someone to make a sonic run with you...you call me. I'll never give them up! I was not trash talking you during the post. I may have trash talked your peeps a little. No boot camp here!

You had me laughing, as usual (and tonight I needed it!). You are so encouraging to me...in fact, I think I'll go have some myself right now!

By the way...sorry about that zit thing. I think it must have left my right cheek and headed to your house. I was not sad to see it go, but I hate that it found you!

Lori Motl said...

I think I'll go have some "ice cream" myself right now. Key words "ICE CREAM" were left out of that comment!