2.23.2010

For The Love of Passie

WARNING:  This post contains material that will make sappy suckers cry.  Don't say I didn't warn you.


This is Tate now.

Cute, right?  Yah.  I know.  But you can tell me again that Kirk and I make pretty babies. 

This is that same pretty baby then.


And here he is again.



And again.




Ugh..this makes my heart hurt.  I miss those squishy cheeks so.stinkin'. much.

But, if you look in every one of those pictures you will see IT.  In fact, if you dig through his scrapbooks you would be hard pressed to find a picture that didn't have IT stuffed in his blessed little mouth.  Or in his hand.  Or two ITs...one in each hand.  Or one at least sitting on the table or counter in the background of a picture.

My purse, our couch, and every other nook and cranny of the house held the blessed plugs hostage.  They multiplied and bred in toy-boxes and under the seats of my van. 

It's how we lived our lives for almost 3 years. 

And I held onto those 3 years with everything I had.

Because Tate was my baby.  My last one.  Milestones like potty-training and sleeping through the night and giving up the bottle hurt my core.  Babyhood was ending.  And I was fighting it with everything that I had.

So it is possible that I let that sweet baby keep his beloved passie for just a wee bit longer than all the baby books said I should.  I didn't really worry about his teeth and the weird looks in Walmart.  Because him holding those plastic plugs in his chubby little hands screamed "BABY" to me. 

And then he grew up one day.  And his daddy (Grrrrr.....) put his foot down on the passie issue, spouting off some weird sermon about him going to prom with a blue sparkly passie stuck in his mouth.  And just like that...the passie was gone.

And I might have cried about it.

And threw the husband dirty looks across the room about it.

And I also might have continued to slip Tate a passie on the sly for 3 months straight.  But if you bring it up...I'll deny it, so don't bother.

Eventually, though, I moved on. 

And I forgot about the passie.

Until.

Yesterday the boys and I were busy working in my bedroom.  We were cleaning and moving some furniture, and I found this.



OH.MY.HEART.

Now....get past the fact that it was actually hiding under my bed, which is just testament to the fact that I NEVER clean under there, and that my mama is mortified about right now.....

But, y'all....I was a mess.
A puddle of snot and tears and mascara on the floor.
And my uterus hurt for more babies.
And then I remembered that I like to sleep at night.  And was over it.

But I did keep the passie. 

Shhhhhh....don't tell the husband. 
He scares easy.

17 comments:

mer@lifeat7000feet said...

Only one of my kids was super attached to his paci. But he was the one who cried alot, so I didn't EVER care.

Those pics are sweet, Amber. Very sweet.

Mich said...

Tatey!!! He will always be the baby of the family.

Truthfully, and mom is going to die that I'm typing this, but I think under the bed is the one place she doesn't clean weekly (or daily)...it is her favorite storage place. :)

Sorry I missed your call...I was at my scrapbooking club.

Love ya!

Jennifer said...

OH.MY.WORD.

You cleaned out from under your bed!!!

Just kiddin'!!!

Yes...you and Mr. Rascal make BEAUTIMOUS babies!!

I miss the passie days!! Hesley use to crack us up cuz he could twirl his passie in his mouth without ever touching it with his hand!!! Couldn't ever figure out how he did it!!

The pics of The Tatey Man are PRICELESS!!

Marla Taviano said...

The haunting memories of sleepless nights assuage my aching uterus too. :)

Terry Lewallen said...

And just to think that I was telling my little Ryne today that he only had a couple more months with Mr. Paci before it had to hit the road. We told ourselves 18 months was going to be the paci limit...worked with Kade....think it is going to be much harder with this guy. And then your sweet post of those passie mouthed pictures of Tate just made me feel all fuzzy and baby loving inside. We will see how it goes.

Marc and Charity said...

Oh man. I am relating to this. We just had the paci talk yesterday- when Bailey was one I took it away cold turkey (how mean!) but i thought I would rather her not get too addicted to it. Addison was one yesterday and there is no way I could take hers away!!! She's just a baby! (and the final one too!)

Kendra said...

If your uterus is longing for a squishy cheeked baby with a sparkly passie, come hold my baby for a while. He can be your proxy.

Cathy said...

Lincs called it paci.

Billy said the exact same things...like, hope his wife doesn't mind him havin' a paci at the wedding and such.

I shot him dirty looks as well.

And then one New Years '10 (which I have yet to blog about) we took a weekend trip to see friends and we forgot ALL pacis and B would.not.let. me buy any.

And I mourned the loss of the paci. And to this day he still asks for the paci. And every.time. it breaks.my.heart.

But I still have his squishy cheeks and I REFUSE to let those go anytime soon.

Oh and Tate is A-freaking-dorable. Just sayin'.

And it's 12:30 AM my time and I'm not sure why I'm still awake so I might be rambling a bit and using run on sentences so I should probably get myself some shut-eye before the way-to-early-even-for-coffee-to-wake-me-up wake up call happens.

The End.

Oh and I love ya.

Emily said...

Oh that boot picture! Ah!

And funny that you found a paci after we were talking about it!

Gretchen said...

Those boots were made for walkin'.
I'd have kept it, too.
Hugs.

Christi said...

Oh, it kills me to see things that make me remember the days when my kiddos were younger...kills me! Love your precious pictures! My
3 1/2 year old is still COMPLETELY, 110% attached to his blanket...he chews/sucks on it, and has for as long as I can remember! I have been the mom that worries about his teeth, while dear dad says that it won't hurt a thing, and that at some point, he will realize that it is not cool to carry around (and suck on) a blanket anymore! And while I do worry, I still think that it is absolutely the cutest thing on the face of the earth. So at this point, daddy (and Carson) win. I can't EVEN IMAGINE the day that we take that away from him...seriously.can't.imagine...

Kris said...

Awwww. Thanks for visiting my blog.

I know what you mean about enjoying the baby things more with your last. I'm doing it now. My baby is starting to get more mobile and discovering her self. So she doesn't need to be held as much and I miss it already. And I know that my baby will soon be a toddler and then in school. It's bittersweet to think about.

I'd have kept the paci too!

Jessica said...

Cutest pictures ever! and I love how you can still see that he's smiling with the paci in. Ave loved hers too, and no matter how much i clean in every nook and cranny, the occasional paci still shows up! I think she has them stashed somewhere.

New Every Morning said...

Can you believe the SAME thing happened to me?!
I found a paci not too long ago and it made my ovaries quake. I may or may not have run to the bathroom and shed some momma-tears.

There's just something about that last baby. So hard to let go... bittersweet.

Tiffani said...

dern my heart.

I want to eat him, then and now.

I cry just THINKING about JuJu's passie or pa pa or pappie..we had a bazillion names for it...so if I found one I'm afraid I'd be a blubbering mess.

So glad he's gonna marry my baby girl so I can have him too! ;)

Nina Diane said...

such sweet pics. And I know...it's sad when that last one grows up but then....then.....whoo hoo, you get your freedom!! yeah....my baby is 21 now...and I get to sleep and do whatever I want!

whimzie said...

He's just pretty. In a rugged good looking boy way.

I still have a mental image of A with B in a headlock so she could still his passy. I thought she'd take hers with her to prom.