Water Cooler Discussions... (Interpretation: What I'm Talking To Myself About)

1.  We don't really have a water cooler at my house.  And if we did have one, it wouldn't be filled with water.  It'd be a tank of sweet tea or over-sugared kool aid.  Because I tend to always over-sugar everything.  Try not to be judgy. 

2.  I giggled and guffawed all over myself this morning as the husband got dressed.  Even after reading this post and rolling his eyes incessantly at me for writing it, he did it again!  He stood in front of the closet and stared.  And then paced to his dresser.  Cracks.Me.Up.Every.Time.

3.  My mother-in-law is getting an extra present this year.  Because she is rescuing the children from their about to blow a gasket if someone doesn't get out of this house this everlovin' minute mother me from the throngs of all things testosterone related this weekend.  The husband is getting his deer hunter on.  The rascals are getting their spoiling on.  And I'm getting the weekend all.to.myself.  I'm going to indulge myself in all thing girly.  And lazy.  And if I clean....there won't be a nasty boy to come behind and mess it up.  At least until Tuesday.  Ah. Sweet bliss.

4.  I just found out that three of my besties have never experienced the wonder and joy that is Mr. Darcy.  It seems like a crime to me that a woman can go through her life without Pride and Prejudice.  I have failed as a friend.

5.  I was a guest blogger the other day over at Jen's place.  Well, really more of a guest hijacker.  She is under the impression that "she doesn't have anything to write about."  And I told her that I was tired of seeing her blog on my sidebar and it never being updated.  So head over there and leave her a comment and tell her that she needs to get her act in gear.

6.  I'm still researching A.D.D. and still think that I have it.  Apparently I have also highly upset my parents by my self-diagnosis.  And I also want to clarify that I don't know that I would put myself on the meds for the disorder.  I just want to know if I have it.  Because I really think it would make me feel better to label all my disorganization and multi-tasking issues on some kind of disorder...rather than just finding out that I can't get my act together. 

7.  Our three legged dog, Ozzie, has been missing for two days now.  We aren't the best pet owners, as many of you well know, and our pets have been known to go off gallivanting for days on end.  But I'm beginning to get nervous.  I'm hoping that Oz is just off a'courtin' or drinkin' coffee with his other old-man-dog-friends.  At least this is what I'm telling the children.

8.  I threw up in Zumba again yesterday.  I'm about to take it as a sign that I should just stop exercising and prepare myself for the onslaught of eatery that is the holidays.  And I had actually been contemplating hiring a personal trainer. But for her personal safety, I had better not. Because I certainly don't need to expose anyone to nasty throwup germs at the height of flu season.  So me stayin' out of the gym is really just lookin' out for the best interest of Jenny the Trainer.  I'm so thoughtful.

9.  Sawyer's flag football season started this week, and I have decided that I was not blessed with the spiritual gift of flag football fanaticism.  It is all I can do to not pick up my chair, march to my car, and go peruse the laundry detergent aisle at Walmart for the duration of the game.  Because that HAS to be more entertaining.  Call me a horrible parent, but I'm not sure why watching flag football isn't a well-executed torture device.

10.  For the past two weeks, I put myself on a strict budget.  My check registry lists NOTHING except bills, a trip to the grocery store (at which I got my heavy coupon on and only bought the necessities on my list), and a fill-up at the gas station.  I'm very proud of us.  It was hard to not whip the van into Sonic for a PDDP, or buy an Almond Joy and an US Weekly in the checkout line, or pick up Arby's beef-n-cheddars for dinner instead of cookin'.  But we did it!  Yeah.Us.

11.  I did, however, go by Cracker Barrel for coffee and a piece of cherry cobbler with my besties yesterday.  But I borrowed five bucks from Keaton for that, so that doesn't really count in the large scheme of things.  I'll pay him back.  Honest, I will.  And besides....coffee, cherry cobbler, and inappropriate conversations with girlfriends is highly necessary...and budgetable.  Because I'm listing that under Therapy...which would fall under Medical Bills.  Naturally.

Alright.  My Water Cooler is tapping out.  Eleven is a weird number to top a list off at, but it doesn't seem as rigid and predictable as ending a list at ten.  So eleven, it is.

Until the Water Cooler is refilled...with all things sugary and bad for you...........